On the Road: Elated and Inflated in Jacksonville

To see all of my posts from this visit to the Jacksonville Suns (this is Part Three) click HERE. To see all of the posts from my April 2015 Florida trip, click HERE. To see all of my “On the Road” posts (going back to 2010), click HERE.

This is the end! The last post from the last stop on my season-opening Florida ballpark road trip. I’m feeling a little loopy as I write this — it’s been a long day and I leave for my next trip tomorrow morning — but not as loopy as I felt while watching the Jacksonville Suns host the Montgomery Biscuits on this wet Saturday night in April.

080My old pals the Zooperstars! were in town.

IMG_1079

Things always get weird when the Zooperstars! are in town. Even when! I’m writing about the Zooperstars! things get weird, as I start! putting exclamation marks in all the wrong! places.

Southpaw was like “Oh, man, how can I compete with those inflatable dancing weirdos?”

IMG_1075“That was a rhetorical question,” Southpaw continued. “But I’ll answer it anyway. I can’t compete with those inflatable dancing weirdos. I just can’t. I’m outta here.”

IMG_1076Upon re-emerging on the concourse, I paid a visit to Pedro Bragan’s concourse “Chairman’s Box.” Here, he poses with his “Victory Bell,” a locomotive bell presented to his father, Peter Bragan Sr., by CSX Transportation.

083

Considering that this game was preceded by a 102-minute rain delay, Pedro was satisfied with how many fans stuck around.

“That’s the power of the Zooperstars!,” he said. (The exclamation mark is part of the Zooperstars! name. Do not mistake its inclusion in the preceding quote for irrational exuberance on the part of Pedro.)

And when that Victory Bell rings, you can hear it everywhere. Even here, in the rain-soaked bleacher section.

084

085While I was out here in the bleacher wilderness, I enjoyed the kind of ballpark snack you just can’t find where I’m from: Salt and Vinegar Pork Rinds and Sweet Tea from the Front Porch Kettle Corn kiosk.

That’ll be it for Baseball Grounds of Jacksonville food coverage, as my designated eater (you know, the individual who eats the ballpark cuisine that my gluten-free diet prohibits) canceled. My attempts to get a new one failed. A lot of people showed interest on Twitter, but no one sent the email that I require. That’s all I ask for: an email. Courteous, conscientious communication. How hard is that?

Anyhow, here’s a photo of one of the concession stands. It’s the best I can do right now.

074After finishing my pork rinds and sweet tea, I continued my slow lap around the concourse. The game seemed like it was a million miles away.

089

Here I am approaching the scoreboard. Repeat: Approaching the scoreboard.

090I had never been so close to a pitch clock before.

I believe that this interesting little left field protrusion is called “The Knuckle.”

094The Knuckle is at the intersection of Amen Circle and Home Run Alley.

095Once I made it back to the seating bowl, I happened upon my old Zooperstar! pal Harry Canary. He had just sung the seventh-inning stretch and needed to let off some steam.

(This is my most-watched Vine of all time.)

Harry then sprayed me with silly string. This is just the sort of thing Harry does. I’m think I’m going to use this as my new online dating profile pic.

IMG_1092I watched the end of the game in close proximity to Bragan’s “Chairman’s Box.”

100But the Victory Bell remained silent on this evening — the Biscuits won the ballgame.

101Thus concluded my time in Jacksonville and thus concluded my season-opening Florida road trip. I’m hitting the road again tomorrow.

See you soon, Midwest.

—

benjamin.hill@mlb.com

twitter.com/bensbiz

instagram.com/thebensbiz

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