Tagged: Calvin Funkhouser

Four Snapshots From Northeastern Ohio

akrondot.gifLast week I put together a post that featured my Top 10 pictures from the 2009 Minor League season. One of the teams included therein was the Akron Aeros, best known to readers of this blog as the team that stages the rough and tumble Cream Stick Race on a nightly basis.

But there is far more to the Aeros’ operation than premeditated outbursts of Vanilla on Maple violence. In order to illustrate this essential truth, Calvin Funkhouser — the Aeros exquisitely-named director of corporate and suite sales — sent me an email containing some of his favorite photos from the 2009 campaign.

Before sharing these photos with the world, I would like to ask that other clubs (and fans) follow the Funk and send me your favorite photos from 2009. I will dutifully post them on this blog, and together they will serve as a beacon of light which will make our treacherous passage along the rocky shores of the offseason slightly less fraught with peril. In case you missed it the first 275 times I posted it, my email is benjamin.hill@mlb.com

And now, let’s check out some pics (italicized text provided by Mr. Funkhouser).

Orbit’s Birthday:

Wait? An intern was just referred to by his real name? And he’s not wearing a white shirt and athletic shorts? And it’s possible that he’s not even wearing New Balance sneakers? Well, then never mind my above analysis of Aero intern policy. It was clearly just a bunch of ponderously unfunny gibberish by a bored writer trying to cope with the relentless slog that is the month of October in Minor League Baseball.

Help me out by emailing me: benjamin.hill@mlb.com


Cream Stick Gets Creamed, Video Gets Posted

sherlock.JPGFriday’s post ended on a note of uncertainty, as I lamented my inability to track down video footage of Vanilla getting knocked out during one of the Akron Aeros’ nightly Cream Stick Races.

Fortunately, I have readers who are more technologically adept than I am. Thanks largely to them, the mystery has been solved. Let me provide you with a brief timeline of what has occurred thus far:

— Friday, September 18: I write an end-of-season update on the Akron Aeros’ Cream Stick Race. The post contains a lengthy email excerpt from Aeros director of corporate and suite sales Calvin Funkhouser, who mentions that Cuyahoga Community College student Danny James possesses video footage of Vanilla getting knocked out. Funkhouser recommends that I and my readers “Facebook bomb” James in order to get him to release the video.

My attempts to find James on Facebook are fruitless, however, a fact I mention within the post. 

— I recieve an email early Saturday evening from “Becca in Boston”, a self-proclaimed “loyal fan” of this blog. Becca explains that I all have to do to locate James is search for his name on Facebook, and then filter the results by school. Who knew? Becca stops short of contacting James herself, however, explaining that “I feel a little sketchy saying ‘Hey, this blogger said this other guy said to contact you about a cream stick video.'”

That’s totally understood, Becca. Totally understood.

— On Sunday evening, commenter “Possum187” takes things a step further by posting a direct link to James’ Facebook page. “I believe this is the video-hoarding Ohioan you speak of” he writes.

— Using the link provided by Possum187, I contact James directly through Facebook. He responds that the video I seek is “on YouTube under Creamstick Gets Creamed.” This represents a major development in The Case of the Missing Cream Stick Video, and I beat a quick path over to YouTube in order to see if James was indeed telling me the truth.

He was! Observe, the long-awaited video of Vanilla getting knocked out:

Perhaps the video was a bit anticlimactic, considering the build-up, but I found it quite enjoyable nonetheless. It took a lot of work for me to bring it to you, the reader, and I couldn’t have done it alone. My sincere thanks to Calvin Funkhouser, Danny James, Becca from Boston, and Possum187. This may have been the first time you four have been mentioned within the span of a single sentence, but I sincerely hope it is not the last.

Update! — On September 23, Funkhouser wrote in with the following bit of pertinient info:





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“For the record, that
was not staged. [Vanilla] was literally out on his feet and they HAD to help him
off the field. Him trying to get up then face-planting on the infield
dirt is my favorite part.