When I’m on the road I always have so much to write about, both here on the blog and over at MiLB.com. This content overload is a good thing, but one negative aspect of it is that I can’t devote enough of my attention to that which is taking place outside of the places I visit.
C’est la vie, as the French say (when they’re giving examples of the cliched French terms that Americans actually know).
But right now? Right now I’m not on the road, nor do I have any more “On the Road” content. Therefore, today will be the first in a short series of bouillabaisse posts, in which I jump haphazardly from item to item with startling rapidity. Commence organized chaos and — warning! — some of this material is rather dated. I’m working my way through this backlog in chronological fashion.
Apropos of nothing — is R.A. Coon the best front office name in Minor League Baseball, or does Lexington’s Ty Cobb retain that honor?
— Beloit Snappers (@BeloitSnappers) March 20, 2013
(Regardless, THIS is the best blog post written by a Minor League broadcaster about someone named R.A.)
You may have seen my recent MiLB.com article about the Jacksonville Suns’ Casey Challenge, in which team president Peter “Pedro” Bragan challenges area school students to memorize the poem.
Well, speaking of the Bragans, did you know that the Suns gave away a “talking bobblehead” of Pete Bragan, Sr., the iconic team owner who passed away last season?
— Jacksonville Suns (@SunsBaseball) March 20, 2013
It really talks. Listen!
(And speaking, as I was, of “Casey at the Bat” — my favorite rendition, by far, is Tug McGraw narrating the poem while backed by Peter Nero and Philadelphia Pops Orchestra. I have it on record, and if anyone would like to assist with the LP-to-computer uploading process then let me know because I need to share it with the world at large.)
The Lehigh Valley IronPigs have long had an almost maniacal propensity for pig-related puns (the Pork Illustrated game program, for example, or a conference room for “Boar”d Meetings). These days, said puns are practically avant-garde.
The team has named its frozen yogurt bar the “Soo’eyte Spot.” You figure it out.
How sweet it is! The Soo’eeyte spot frozen yogurt bar is having its grand opening tonight at Coca-Cola Park! twitter.com/IronPigs/statu…
— IronPigs (@IronPigs) April 5, 2013
I have no idea how or why this happened (and it seems to have happened on multiple occasions), but the Erie SeaWolves are most likely the only team to have a Dr. Batboy.
I would like for there to be a band named “Dr. Batboy.”
— Eric Brookhouser (@ebrook24) April 12, 2013
Meanwhile, via Visalia broadcaster Donny Baarns, this photo of multi-generational intolerance:
— Donny Baarns (@DonnyBaarns) April 14, 2013
And, that’s it for now. Much more where this came from, as soon as time allows.
I have written many times in the past about Lehigh Valley’s propensity for pig puns, but they really outdid themselves with a press release put out on Friday.
In this missive, the team heaps praise upon a Washington man who saved a pig by giving it “mouth-to-snout” resuscitation:
In hearing a hoof-warming story of a man saving a pig through CPR in La
Center, Wash., IronPigs mascots FeRROUS and FeFe wanted to publicly
honor and award human hero Jeff Olson.
For his saving the life of “Pig Pig” though mouth-to-snout
resuscitation, the pair will be sending a care package to Olson —
which consists of an IronPigs sweatshirt, a bottle of Listerine and
tube of ChapStick – along with an offer for free IronPigs tickets for
he and his wife any time they are in the Lehigh Valley.
But here’s where it really gets good:
In a written statement, FeRROUS had the following words for Olson: “On
behalf of FeFe and all pigs in the Lehigh Valley, I would like to
porksonally say ‘thank you’ to Mr. Olson for going above and beyond the
Call of Suey. By risking life, limb and a lifetime of bad breath,
little Pig Pig will one day be able to go to the market.”
The appearance of “porksonally” and “Call of Suey” in the span of one sentence is a tremendous gift, the sort of thing that gives me the strength to carry on for another day.
Even if the day in question is exactly like the one that preceded it — Groundhog Day, if you will. And I assume you will, because that’s what today is — Groundhog Day, if you will. And I assume you will, because that’s what today is — Groundhog Day.
To sum it up: Groundhog Day is today!
The world-famous Punxutawney Phil saw his shadow, supposedly condemning the nation to six more weeks of winter. But those within the world of Minor League Baseball should instead heed the prognositications of Gwinnett County’s General Beauregard Lee, who failed to spot his shadow. General Lee has far greater baseball credentials, as he served as the inspiration for Gwinnett Braves mascot Chopper (the world’s most seductive groundhog, as you may recall).
Next up on the holiday calendar is Valentine’s Day, which I have already covered extensively. However, there is PLENTY more where that came from — prepare thyself.