In much the same way that a bear lives off of its own fat throughout the winter, I am able to survive the lean times by relying on my great storehouse of Minor League content.

Today I’ll dip into that vast reserve in order to bring you a steaming bouillabaisse of words and images from the 2011 campaign (I just spelled “bouillabaisse” correctly on the second attempt, tying my personal best in this category).

Let’s start with our friends in the mountain foothills, that distinguished Carolina League entity known as the Lynchburg Hillcats. Last month, the team staged a NASCAR Night promotion and staged it well.

It all started in the stadium parking lot, with cars from different eras of racing history stationed therein.

Also present was the official pace car from nearby Martinsville Speedway, one of the night’s sponsors.

The evening’s guest of honor was Rex White, a legendary racer who in 1960 won the NASCAR Grand National Championship.

Meanwhile, Danny “Dale Earnhardt” Dudley was named “Best Dressed Fan.”

Between-inning games and contests were centered around the theme. Here, the green flag signals the start of the “Tire Roll”…

…while a white flag indicates the last lap of the Pool Sprint.

Moving from cars to guitars, last month the Reading Phillies welcomed a touring performer I had never before heard of: the Sauce Boss. Not only does this guy play “Florida Slide Guitar Blues,” but he cooks gumbo on stage and serves it to the audience.

Keeping with the song and dance theme, the Fort Wayne TinCaps held a ’90s Night Promotion in August that included innovations such as the following:

— The “92^nd”  inning, commemorating Nirvana’s release of “Smells like Teen Spirit” with a “What’s that Smell” onfield promotion.

— The strike-shortened “94^th inning”, in which all promotions were stopped in the middle in memory of the MLB strike which began on August 12, 1994.

— The Titanic “King of the World” cam in the 98^th inning.

And then there was this:

Even more horrifying is a ballpark character I learned about during the recent Minor League Baseball Promotional Seminar: the New Hampshire Fisher Cats’ “Ram of War.”

This unapologetic villain competes against children in between-inning contests, crushing their dreams and feeding off the screams:

Brilliant. The world of Minor League Baseball needs more bad guys, they make us all look good in comparison.

benjamin.hill@mlb.com

twitter.com/bensbiz